Claiming back my life

Claiming back my life

The biggest problem with your children reading your blog posts is that you may not want to be a blatant about this or that. Or you are afraid you may offend them, which of course neither i no you would want to do so. I have spent the last 28 years looking after and teaching my children to survive in a world that isn’t always fair. Then at the very moment i was going to finally have some time, space and money for myself disaster struck and then as i struggled to come to terms with the bad stuff i then became a grandmother.

Now don’t get me wrong. I love my children and my granddaughter’s very much, but a mummy (grandma) without a life of their own, no matter how limited, is no mummy at all. I have decided that children are like water, they get everywhere and i know there are those who will be reading this and saying ‘i should be grateful for what i have’ and i am, honestly i am.

At the moment i have my daughter Emily and my granddaughter living with me and what a blessing they have been. Emily has cleared out more stuff for charity in the last month than i would have been able to do and who can help but smile when 8 month old Amelia waves her hand at you and smiles from ear to ear every morning. I would love to sell the house or maybe even walk away from it, it’s in need of a lot of repair mostly cosmetic, but doing that now would make my children homeless. Looking for a home for two, as Emily would need to, is not that easy, especially when funds are limited.

My daughter’s mutter about me not eating. I say ‘soup’ they say that’s not enough. So i end up eating more than i want.

My daughter’s mutter about me sleeping a lot. I don’t sleep lots every day just some days, but it used to be every day

My daughter’s mutter i shouldn’t stay in all the time. But i am trying to turn my bedroom into a sacred space, complete and mandala and read more,

My daughter’s eat meat, i say i don’t like it, my stomach doesn’t like it and it doesn’t taste good.

My dearest daughter’s i need all of you, but can you please stop fussing.

I have threatened to eat only junior baby food (and coco pops) and stay in bed all the time be grateful that at least i am not doing either of those things – just yet!


6 thoughts on “Claiming back my life

  1. LOL, Yes meaningful I know they are, but Mum’s too have to have their space! and choices!…
    Hi Beverley, sending you some hugs, Gosh you are a treasure, my daughter stayed with me a few days some years after moving out and boy were we both glad she moved back out! lol For we both had got used to our own spaces…. So you deserve a medal… Love and Hugs xoxx

    1. my daughter and granddaughter have been here over 5 weeks now. she had things to sort out and i got the fact that she needed a space to come to and she has been helpful but its time to move along. xx

  2. Well at least you know we care. Its not our fault if we fuss. We just wanna make sure you’re okay. We csnt make the pain go away as much as we would want to and we cant stop you from staying in bed all day as much as we would want to. The only thing we can do is constantly ask how you are and make sure you are looking after yourself in any way that you can because the truth is, if it were the opposite way round and we were the ones with fibromyalgia, then you would be doing just the same. We fuss because we care, we care because you only get one mum. 🙂

    Dearest Daughter no. 1

    1. I never said i didn’t love you, but if i moved into your house there would be a limit on how long you would put up with me before you would want me to move out lol 🙂 xx

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